Yaqui Delgado Wants to Kick Your Ass

“She’s just alive in a way that Ma is too tired to remember. It’s like Lila can still hear the rhythm in a salsa on the radio and not just complain about the noise.”

Piddy compares her mother, Clara, to the woman’s best friend, Lila. Her mother’s fatigue derives from a hard life and past heartache that Piddy knows almost nothing about. She sees a vivaciousness in Lila that her mother lacks, juxtaposing Lila’s aliveness and appreciation of salsa music with Ma’s tiredness and complaint about “the noise.” This is foreshadowing because Piddy, too, will become a shell of herself once Yaqui begins bullying her.

“I open the yearbook and start paging through it as fast as I can. Basketball games, Ping-Pong, Yearbook Club, Drama. I check the cover to make sure it’s not a mistake. It’s like I’m reading about another place entirely. The school in this book has nothing to do with the place where I spend my days, the place where three in ten of us won’t graduate. It doesn’t show the empty air around me as I wait alone in the school yard, the bathrooms I won’t go into, or the dead look I have to keep on my face as I go from class to class.”

The difference between the yearbook and Piddy’s experience highlights the contrast between perception and reality. The yearbook represents the superficial positives of Daniel Jones High. The reality, however, is a low graduation rate and bullying. Likewise, teachers and adults only perceive a student who is usually alone and appears not to care; they fail to understand why Piddy behaves the way she does due to The Impact of Bullying on Mental Health.

“Her parents are so utterly boring, old-fashioned, and ordinary. Her dad works at the clinic, and her mom volunteers, does the laundry, and cooks. Everybody does his or her job—and Mitzi’s is only to study. I decide that annoys me, too. What would my life be like if my dad were still around? Easier, I bet, just like hers.”

Piddy struggles with the fact that she has no father in her life. She constantly wonders how things would be with a dad in the picture, comparing her life to people like Mitzi and even imagining that strangers are her long-lost dad. Although Mitzi’s parents are “utterly boring, old-fashioned, and ordinary,” Piddy is envious, assuming having a father still in her life would make it “easier.” As a result, Piddy possesses a “grass is always greener” mentality, meaning that she believes any life other than her own is better.

“Joey Halper is sitting on the stoop, eating a frozen Popsicle, even though the October cold is biting through my jacket. He’s grinning at me in that way of his. He has a new haircut—buzzed close to the scalp like a prisoner. He tries to look vicious, but it never really works. Even the day the cop car brought him home for shoplifting, he looked like a scared little kid to me. I’m pretty sure he was crying.”

Joey represents how a tough exterior can mask fear. Describing him as a vicious prisoner, Piddy recognizes the facade too. This observation is ironic and foreshadowing because Piddy herself will assume a hardened persona when Yaqui bullies her. Eventually, she plucks her eyebrows to look meaner despite the anxiety and terror that lurks inside her.

“They’re her worst nightmare of what a Latin girl can become in the United States. Their big hoop earrings and plucked eyebrows, their dark lips painted like those stars in the old black-and-white movies, their tight T-shirts that show too much curve and invite boys’ touches. The funny thing is, if I could be anything right now, I’d be just like one of them. I’d be so strong that I could stand without flinching if people pelted me with rubber balls. I’d be so fierce that people would cross to the other side of the street when they saw me coming. Yaqui and me, we should be two hermanas, a sisterhood of Latinas. We eat the same food. We talk the same way. We come from countries that are like rooms in one big house, but instead, we’re worlds apart.”

When Piddy and her mom see Yaqui and her friends, Clara complains about how the girls are indecent, and these thoughts race through Piddy’s mind. They demonstrate her mother’s belief that the United States has corrupted the girls’ behavior and, thus, fueled negative stereotypes about Latinas. Additionally, Piddy believes she is weak. She longs to be tough like Yaqui. However, Piddy acknowledges that although they are culturally similar and should be connected by their “sisterhood,” they are “worlds apart” in other ways.

“Part of me doesn’t want to know, the same part that wishes I could be a kid again and just let Lila hug me so I could feel her heartbeat through the wall of her chest. But I’m almost a woman now. That’s what everyone says. There’s no going back.”

After hearing gossip about her mother, Piddy questions Lila. However, she longs to be an oblivious “kid” who is comforted easily by a hug. Despite this, she recognizes that childhood innocence is no longer possible. When she admits that “there’s no going back,” Piddy understands that with age comes harsh truths, which cannot be unlearned.

“One post catches my eye. It has a bulldog inside a circle with a diagonal red line. BULLY-FREE ZONE. STAND UP. SPEAK OUT, it says. I almost laugh out loud.”

Piddy sees this poster in the guidance office and laughs because it is ironic. The perception that the school is bully-free is false. Furthermore, this irony points out a realistic challenge schools face, especially with cyberbullying: Adults cannot always see the abuse that occurs. Children must speak up, but as is the case with Piddy, those targeted by bullies are often scared to do so. Because they face The Difficulties of Standing Up Against Injustice, it is not as straightforward as the poster’s “STAND UP. SPEAK OUT.” message.

“Lying here in bed, I feel broken into a million pieces. My head is a brick, and my legs don’t want to take me to school.”

The day after Yaqui steals her necklace, Piddy cannot get out of bed. Medina uses multiple literary devices to illustrate the weight of Piddy’s dread, fear, and anxiety. The imagery of her shattered into “a million pieces” highlights how fractured and broken down she feels. The metaphor comparing her head to a brick emphasizes the heaviness of Piddy’s constant dread and anxiety, showing the impact of bullying on mental health. These emotions also impact her physically, for Medina uses personification to indicate that her legs refuse to move.

“I’m about to step inside when I notice something that makes me stop. To my shock, her hips are moving in a seductive swish from left to right. I watch from the doorway for a minute to make sure the heat isn’t making me see things. But no: Ma is definitely dancing, even if it is all by herself. I’ve never seen her do it before, not once.”

Piddy catches her mother dancing alone in the kitchen at Lila’s party. This moment highlights that Clara chooses to be stoic and stern. The joy of music is in her, but she does not typically let it show. Furthermore, because Piddy is stunned and has never seen her mother dance before, she reveals how little they know each other. The unusual sight shocks Piddy because she is not used to seeing her mother enjoying herself.

“She starts to come in, and every hair on my arms seems to bristle. The empty seat beside me suddenly feels like a monster magnet. I can’t breathe.”

Piddy is in Saturday detention when Yaqui arrives late. Piddy has a visceral reaction to the bully: arm hair rising, loss of breath, and, later, trembling. Not only does Yaqui’s torment affect Piddy’s emotions and self-perception but it also causes a strong physical reaction. As soon as Yaqui appears, Piddy senses danger. Her body’s response to stress and fear are typical reactions when in survival mode.

“It made me mad. She claims she never got my text about Yaqui ripping me off, but I don’t know. Would Mitzi lie? I have so many things to tell her, but it’s getting harder […] But lately, every time I call, she’s been busy, and I wonder if maybe she doesn’t really want to know about me and my problems anymore.”

When Piddy celebrates her 16th birthday, she wishes Mitzi were there and thinks about how her friend seems to be slipping away. Since Mitzi moved away, their relationship has weakened, highlighting the difficulties of long-distance friendship. Furthermore, Piddy’s doubt about Mitzi’s care incites a withdrawal from her friend, both effects of being bullied.

“This can’t be happening. If anyone sees that essay and has half a brain, they might recognize the real monster I’m talking about. Then I’m dead for sure.”

When Piddy learns that Ms. Shepherd has started a magazine and is posting chosen essays to a bulletin board, Piddy panics. Instead of feeling pride in her writing, she is terrified. Being bullied has induced paranoia, and she assumes that everyone is watching her and looking for reasons to attack her. The monster essay she wrote is about Yaqui, and she fears retribution if anyone finds out.

“‘J.C. McCleary. I gave you the application, stupid. It’s the science magnet school for juniors and seniors. You get college credit while you’re still in high school. I hear they have good engineering programs, if you don’t mind the geeks. You might be smart enough to get in.’ She considers me for a second. ‘Plus you have that Latina advantage for admission.’”

Darlene is impressed with Piddy’s grasp of physics and tells her about McCleary. However, she insults Piddy, calling her “stupid” and saying she “might” get in. Furthermore, she notes that Piddy would be accepted because of her race, which implies that she will get in even if she does not deserve to. This microaggression reinforces stereotypes that Latinas are not smart and are only accepted into rigorous academic programs because they fill a diversity quota. The fact that Darlene pauses, considering Piddy before adding this quip, emphasizes the intentional, calculated nature of her insult.

“‘Nothing’s wrong, Mitzi. Nothing at all.’ I’m practically shouting. ‘Everything is just perfect. Why don’t you just forget me and enjoy your new life.’”

When Piddy surprises Mitzi with a visit to Long Island, their time together is tense. Instead of being happy that her friend has acclimated to her new home and school, Piddy is bitter, believing that Mitzi has forgotten her to “enjoy” her new life. This anger causes Piddy to push Mitzi away instead of asking for the help she needs.

“I’m fighting with all my might, scraping my nails deep along her arms, but I’m in a no-man’s land now. Though Daniel Jones is still in sight, I’m off school grounds and there are no crowds to help, just passersby who stop, point. Only a cop can save me now, and there’s none around. Mrs. Boika looks out her kitchen curtains in shock, but she’s too scared to move.”

When Yaqui attacks, Piddy fights back the best she can. Although there are witnesses, no one steps in. In psychology, this is called the bystander effect; the more witnesses there are to a crime, the less responsibility an individual feels to help. This combined with shock and fear, as seen with Mrs. Boika who is “too scared to move,” paralyzes bystanders.

“It’s quiet on the street as I hesitate at the outside door. Fear is my new best friend. It stands at my elbow in chilly silence.”

The weekend after Yaqui attacks her, Piddy takes the trash outside. By personifying fear as a friend who accompanies her everywhere, Medina emphasizes how intense and all-consuming Piddy’s terror is. Where she had anxiety and dread before, now, an intense fear persists even during everyday tasks at home. This highlights how bullying can inflict both physical wounds and lasting emotional trauma.

“I run down the street blindly, her words chasing me like bad spirits as I go. Where are you going? Where are you going? No matter how fast I go, her voice is there in my ears.”

After arguing with her mother about skipping school, Piddy storms out as Clara shouts at her. The question reflects how adrift Piddy is. She “blindly” runs not just down the street but through her days. Unable to face school, she wanders through the city without a plan. This literal and figurative lack of direction is another effect of Yaqui’s bullying, showing the impact of bullying on mental health.

“It’s the only picture I’ve ever seen of my father, the one thing I’ve searched for. But now a strange emptiness fills me as I ask Ma the one thing I’ve always been afraid to know.”

Piddy often imagines that strangers are her father, and she constantly wonders who he is. Now that her mother has shown her a photograph of the man, she feels surprisingly empty as dread mounts. In a moment, she asks her mother “the one thing” she has previously been too afraid to ask: whether he wanted her. The “strange emptiness” she feels is foreshadowing the truth that her father does not want her.

“My head is filled with all the times cops have come on account of the Halpers before. Nothing is happening. I’m sorry for this fuss. He’s drunk—that’s all. That’s what Mrs. Halper always said. But now I can’t help but wonder: Why didn’t she just tell the truth? Why was she apologizing?

My stomach is squeezed into a queasy knot, and my mouth fills with saliva as the ambulance pulls away. Lila slips her arm around my shoulder to steady me, but it’s too much.

‘Piddy?’

I lean over the bushes and throw up.”

When Piddy watches the ambulance take Mrs. Halper away after her husband has physically abused her worse than ever, these thoughts arise. Her questions about why Mrs. Halper apologizes and never speaks the truth are ironic, for Piddy has done the same due to the difficulties of standing up against injustice. For the most part, Piddy has kept her problems to herself. Furthermore, she has also apologized to Joey for her bruises. Piddy is sick because she realizes that she is no different than Mrs. Halper. Piddy pretended not to see Mr. Halper’s violence, just like the bystanders who watched Yaqui beat up Piddy.

“That’s how it is where she’s growing up. Beat or get beaten.”

When Piddy confesses that there is a video of the fight, Lila urges Piddy to stand her ground and not let Yaqui win. When Piddy pushes back, Lila explains what the bully’s life is like. Yaqui lives in a tough neighborhood and is always in survival mode with a “beat or get beaten” mentality. This does not excuse Yaqui’s behavior, but it proves that despite her meanness, she is human and complicated due to her life circumstances. Providing Piddy with this insight further underscores how Lila demonstrates Community as a Support System.

“My knees feel weak and I suddenly want to follow, but if I go with him, Yaqui will have taken everything from me. Ma and Lila and Mitzi. Even who I want to be.”

At the bus station, Piddy fights the urge to go with Joey. She has a connection with him and sees an opportunity to leave the bullying behind. However, she demonstrates strength by choosing to stay because leaving means losing loved ones and her future. Although she does not realize it, this is a turning point in her character arc, for Piddy decides to fight back.

“My throat tightens into a wad of sadness. Things are already so out of hand, she has no idea. I’m thinking all at once of Joey and Mrs. Halper and all the days we heard her through the pipes. All those times the cops came and left, empty-handed. It’s all right, she’d say. Nothing happened. She didn’t accept help, but maybe she was just too afraid to take it.”

In Mr. Flatwell’s office, after Piddy finds out about the anonymous report of bullying, Piddy has these thoughts. Recalling Mrs. Halper makes Piddy realize that she is in the same situation. When she notes that Mrs. Halper was too scared to accept help, she is also referring to herself. Ultimately, this comparison gives Piddy the courage to speak out.

“She looks at the charm and then back at me, mute. When she stands up, instead of telling me my idea is crazy, Ma pulls me to her and hugs me so tight and for so long that I can feel her heart beating in her throat. It’s so pure that it takes my breath away. It’s as if she’s pressing all her strength through my skin and into the marrow of my bones.”

After Piddy confesses everything, including her dream to one day work with animals, Clara says nothing and just hugs her. Medina’s description of the hug as “pure” and “pressing all her strength” into Piddy demonstrates the unadulterated and deep love Clara has for her daughter. She does not question Piddy nor argue with her. Instead, she gives her the one thing Piddy needs most: love. The tone shifts from Piddy’s hopelessness and despair to one of optimism and love.