57 pages • 1 hour read
They Can't Kill Us Until They Kill Us
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Key Figures
Hanif Abdurraqib
Hanif Abdurraqib (1983-) is a poet, culture critic, and essayist from Columbus, Ohio. He is the author of two collections of poetry: The Crown Ain’t Worth Much (2016) and A Fortune for Your Disaster (2019). Additionally, he has published three nonfiction collections: They Can’t Kill Us Until They Kill Us (2017), Go Ahead in the Rain: Notes to a Tribe Called Quest (2019), and A Little Devil in America: Notes In Praise of Black Performance (2021). A Little Devil in America was a finalist for the National Book Award and the National Book Critics Circle Award.
In 2021, Abdurraqib was awarded a MacArthur Fellowship, also known as a “Genius Grant.” He won the award for “Forging a distinctive style of cultural and artistic criticism through the lens of popular music and autobiography” (“Hanif Abdurraqib.” MacArthur Foundation). Abdurraqib is known in both his poetry and nonfiction writing for blending music with cultural identity, often exploring his identity as a Black Muslim man in America.
In They Can’t Kill Us Until They Kill Us, Abdurraqib operates in two main roles: enthusiastic music critic and grieving artist. As a music critic, Abdurraqib embraces artists regardless of whether or not they are critically acclaimed. He unabashedly loves Carly Rae Jepsen and Fall Out Boy and does not hesitate to question more critically beloved musicians, such as The Weeknd. He seeks to find some good in the music he’s listening to, even if it’s difficult to do so, putting into practice his belief in the Enthusiasm, Joy, and Community in Music.
Abdurraqib is open about both his own pain and the pain of the world. He frequently writes about crying in public and in private, challenging the stereotype that men are emotionless. In doing so, he models Rewriting Narratives and Incorrect Perceptions about Black men by presenting himself as a nuanced, dynamic character.
Tyler
The entire third section of the collection is an elegy to Abdurraqib’s friend Tyler. After meeting at a Fall Out Boy concert, the two men become close friends, often traveling to see Fall Out Boy perform. A fellow Midwesterner, Tyler was enthusiastic, always jumping around in the mosh pit and giving artists a second chance to impress him with their live performances. Abdurraqib describes Tyler as a “fighter” and a loyal friend who often “fought kids who fucked with [them] at punk shows” (104). Tyler was affected by depression and ultimately died by suicide. Abdurraqib struggled immensely with his friend’s death, in part because he did not answer Tyler’s last phone call. While Tyler appears in essays before Part 3, he does not appear in any of the following sections, implying that Abdurraqib has finally laid him to rest.
Abdurraqib’s Mother
Abdurraqib’s mother died unexpectedly in 1997 from a fatal reaction to a medication she took for bipolar disorder. Abdurraqib describes her as having a loud voice and laugh and going out of her way to make others feel seen and welcome, often putting her own discomfort aside in the process. While Abdurraqib believes he takes after his father more, he feels that his mother truly saw his personality and talents, recognizing him as the nuanced man he is.
Abdurraqib never reveals his mother’s first name, only referring to her as “my mother” throughout the text. This emphasizes their close, familial bond and the fact that he misses having this maternal figure in his life.
Marvin Gaye
Marvin Gaye (1939-1984) was a Black American soul and Motown singer. While he was a talented artist comfortable with a range of styles and subject matter, he was affected by depression, an addiction to cocaine, and longstanding family conflict. He was ultimately murdered by his father, who shot Gaye after a series of arguments.
Gaye’s album What’s Going On is widely considered one of the first Motown albums to deal with social issues and inequalities, and it is the subject of Abdurraqib’s six-part essay following the last years of Gaye’s life. Gaye operates as a conduit for Abdurraqib to explore the Black artist’s difficulties and pain. Through Gaye’s music, Abdurraqib remembers, “There is no America when I do not feel like I am fighting” (96). Additionally, Gaye represents the theme of rewriting narratives. Abdurraqib spends much of his essay showing the nuances of Gaye’s life to ensure that no one will “speak of how you earned your death after you are gone far too soon” (47).
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